Motherhood sucks

Motherhood sucks. 
No, not because my kids don’t listen 
and they just won’t obey, 
Not because I have to change plans,  
cancel many a night of jazz 
not even because silence is a dream, 
and conversations have to happen even in the shower! 

Who needs dance and dates when we have boys and books?

Parenting is the worst thing to happen to any human, 
not because of the sleep I have given up 
the puke on my shirt, or the endless hours with the pump. 
Not even because my mind is tired 
counting hours between medicines 
managing days of the week and life schedules.
Neither because priorities have changed, 
the personal has to take a step back. 

Being a mother is hard, and I say this, 
not because feeding kids is impossible
or getting them to dry their hair is a battle 
each and every morning. 
Not even because ‘No’ is their first and favoritest word,
or because they choose to do 
exactly what I tell them NOT to do
exactly when I don’t want them to 
and where I told them not to. 

All of That and MORE, 
I am willing to take, 
readily accept 
and am happy to deal with. 
Parenting is hard, 
because you are reminded of how vulnerable 
you are. 
How not in control!
A mosquito can hurt you, 
pollution and allergies have you at their mercy,  
there are diseases that you can’t spell, 
and if you escape those, 
just a simple fever and cough, 
they will leave you miserable.

Being a mother is heartbreaking 
because you have to watch them 
as they fight for air, and struggle to breathe, 
you have to look into their pleading eyes helplessly 
as they tear up in desperation 
or hold them as they writhe and cry in pain,
even see them lie still
not even able to smile. 
Motherhood sucks because 
you can’t protect them
burning skin, broken arms, cuts and stitches 
all things that could hurt them, 
the losses, the heartbreak, 
the life damning decisions. 

Parenting is the worst thing to happen to anyone
because no matter what the situation, 
you have to pull it together
and steel yourself, 
sometimes dunk them in cold water 
even as they shiver and shriek
or force medicines down their throat 
while they beg and plead 
you have standby and watch them 
fall and fail,  
help them stand and dust their scrapes, 
even though they deserve it,
you have to question their choices, 
and be hated for it, 
Stand by your decisions and 
let them live by theirs.

Parenting is hard because 
they are your parrots, 
your life is stuck in theirs. 

My Parrots!

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